Knowing Myself
Space, Honesty & Understanding
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself as I am, then I can change.”
Carl Rogers
Minimalism
Minimalism is the intentional use of resources - and my most precious resource is my attention. The value of my life is cashed out in satisfying or unsatisfying uses of attention.
Island, Agnes Martin 1961
S P A C E
Sometimes, to think clearly, I have to step out of the world a little. Not forever. Just long enough to feel undistracted, undivided, undisturbed. Long enough to reconnect with my attention.
Clear thinking doesn’t just happen. It has to be chosen. And that choice, at times, will look strange to others - unnecessary, dramatic, even selfish. But the real absurdity is how little we question the noise.
We treat constant interruption as normal. We’re OK with how interference fractures our insight. We forget that distraction is a debility, and that we need help with devoting ourselves to the tasks we’re committed to.
Setting up the conditions for clear thinking itself requires thought.
Building up a few walls is a design solution.1
Empress Theatre, Alcide Chaussé’ 1927
Architects & Archaeologists
An architect begins with a plan. The vision comes first - clean lines, deliberate forms. Construction follows the drawing, piece by piece, until the imagined becomes real.
An archaeologist works in reverse. There’s no certainty - only clues in the dust. Something is already there, just hidden. And while there may be theories as to what it might be, they bend as the truth reveals itself. When the findings contradict the assumptions, it’s the assumptions that change.
There’s a metaphor here:
To create yourself is self-architecture.
To discover yourself is self-archaeology.
Both matter. One offers direction. The other, depth. And when practiced together, they don’t just build a life - they uncover its meaning.
Head of Hygieia, Laodikeia 1st Century BCE
Honesty
“The whole journey is toward the truth... how could it possibly help to plant a lie in the middle of it?”2
Self-knowledge matters, because it gives me a better chance at happiness and fulfillment. But to get it, I need to be honest. Really honest. Not just about the noble parts - but also about the ones that feel less “spiritual.”
Do I want to stand out? Then I should admit that. Do I want power, control, comfort, and legacy? Great - name it clearly.
There’s no shame in wanting what I want. The trouble starts when I pretend not to. What’s dishonest doesn’t disappear - it just hides in the background and muddies my thinking. But if I can be speak the thing I’m afraid to say, the fear loses its grip - and I can find a way to bring it into harmony with my higher aims.
If I don’t speak it, it shapes me in shadow. If I do, I can shape it in light.
Marjory's World #8, Rebecca Reeve 2012
Karma Yoga
“The body is like a carriage. Our emotions are the horses pulling it. Thought is the coachman, holding the reins. And the one giving direction - the deeper self behind it all - that’s what we call ‘I.’”3
OK. I see myself more clearly now. The next step is to live from that place. It helps to carry something with me - a kind of talisman or dreamscape.
I think about the truest version of myself. Not flawless, but whole. I picture it in fresh and vivid detail. Throughout the day, I hold onto it. I let it shape my choices and filter my decisions. This isn’t pressure, it’s permission - a gentle reminder of where my heart is leading me.
And when resistance visits (as it always does), I greet it and let it pass through. I recognize it for what it is: a tired old ghost with nothing new to say. As quickly as I can, I keep walking toward what I love.
Krishna and Arjuna, Kangra Pahari, Delhi Museum 19th Century
The walls aren’t meant to stay up. Solitude helps me gather myself - but I also know I discover myself in others. Friendships, romantic relationships, creative partnerships - these, too, are spaces for understanding and development. The work continues there, just in a different light.
St. Aubyn
Georgij Gurdijieff
This is beautiful, thank you J